One client's story...

Bob's dream was to leave his existing job to set up his own creative business. Unfortunately, he felt far too fearful to make it a reality.

EFT treatment enabled him to relax and focus on his presenting emotions and his physical symptoms of fear about moving forward.
I guided him through some techniques that led him to some events in his past that were all connected:

He realised, coming from a large family, that he and his siblings had always been treated exactly the same, they were never 'seen' and 'heard' fully as unique individuals. As a result, he had never developed a strong self-esteem and sense of identity. He never formed a secure attachment to his parents who didn't nurture him in the ways he needed. Whatever the reason for this was, it was subsequently very hard for him to trust himself in adulthood.

He remembered an event where there had been a massive overreaction to something he had done. He had been playing with a friend behind a curtain when his mum was late picking him up from Cub Scouts. When he wasn't immediately visible on her arrival, she panicked and went back outside to search. When his mum later discovered him playing behind the curtain he was smacked and so was his friend!

On arrival home, his mum had to retire to bed she was so upset. His grand-parents who happened to be visiting also scolded him for upsetting his mum. He also had the wrath of his dad, the taunting of his siblings and the friend later at school blaming him for getting hit by his mum!

That's a lot of judgement and blame from a lot of people in his life at such a young age, when really, what had he actually done wrong? This was a significant trauma!

The confusion about his mum’s overreaction at this young age, and the connected events where everyone had an opinion on how 'bad' he was, had led him to believe that he had done something terrible and that he was actually a fundamentally 'bad' person. He remembered feeling so confused - he had just been playing!

On examining the possibilities of what had likely been going on for his mum that day, he realised none of it meant anything about him after all. It meant a lot about her; she was struggling with depression and high anxiety, perhaps she had just burnt the dinner, maybe she was struggling to do everything she needed to do, she wasn’t coping, his dad worked away a lot and she was on her own, her family background had been very difficult, he realised that she loved him and was doing the very best she could under difficult circumstances. 

There were also memories of him observing how his parents expressed themselves. They were so shy that they found it hard to even ask for what they needed in a restaurant and would argue about it in front of him. There were times that his mum even made them all hide behind the sofa if someone came to the door they didn't want to speak to. He also remembers that whenever he tried to express himself, he was told to 'shut up' or 'stop showing off'.

Many 'opposing' emotions required for moving forward confidently were blocking his path...His parents had inadvertently taught him to hide. He carried around a belief that he was 'wrong' in some way all of his adult life as a result of the 'curtain' event. They also taught him that it is not safe to be confident or powerful or to even ask for support. They also made it clear that it is not OK to be who you are through self-expression.

These childhood events were unconsciously playing out in his adult life.

No wonder he felt stuck in moving forward with his business idea, his passion of choice!

Having identified the links and the core event relative to his fears, he could now reframe all those memories using EFT.

He no longer felt anxious and depressed and made all that stuff mean something about him.

His parents' behaviour and reactions to their lives were actually nothing to do with him!

As soon as he was able to see these situations from their perspectives, that these were their issues and not his, he no longer felt this fear of moving forward! 

He no longer made all that mean something about him and therefore, he no longer felt this fear of moving forward!

He was free! He is now set up in his business and trading happily and successfully.

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Disclaimer: Emotional Freedom Techniques are not intended to diagnose, prescribe or treat any physical or mental disease. EFT is a Complementary Therapy and although it often gets powerful results, it is still regarded as new and experimental by the mainstream. These techniques are not intended as a substitute for traditional medical, psychological or psychiatric care. Jenny Luscombe is not medically trained and does not advocate discontinuing prescribed medication or medical, psychological or psychiatric care without consulting your Doctor.

Make your dream a reality...EFT enabled him to relax and focus on his emotions and physical symptoms of fear about moving forward EFT identified the blocks